Redneck Revival

 The Redneck Revival at Conesville, Iowa has been a fairly consistent stop over maybe the last ten years.  The event occurs twice a year around Memorial Day and Labor Day.  Brad and I have bonded with some folks there while enjoying the races and bands.  Over the years the group of friends have dwindled with understandable competing interests.  One notable friend, Fig, had a stroke a couple years before and can no longer attend the rallies.  The last time I saw Fig at Conesville he had raced a Ford Mustang down the drag strip.  Oh, that reminds me. One year Fig showed up at the rally after he converted his cargo trailer into a travel trailer.  He had built a bed that folds up along the wall inside the cargo trailer. So there was space for his motorcycle and car inside the trailer.  Plus he could sleep in the trailer when the car is removed.  What I remember is after the rally was over, several of us got texts from Dawn.  Dawn had slept late that morning, inside the trailer.  Fig woke early to shuttle things to his house in a nearby town.  He locked Dawn inside the cargo trailer where she was sleeping!  The camp ground was emptying out.  Dawn had texted everyone to find Fig and have him unlock the door.  I read the group texts hours later with a slight chuckle.  It might have been a funny story for everyone except Dawn!  I think Dawn made Fig put windows in the trailer later that year!  

It was Memorial Day 2025.  About seven members of the group of friends showed up at the last minute this year.  Brad and I are thankful for the opportunity to catch up with the friends that were present.  

This year we spent more time around the camp fire.  Dean and Dodie who we haven’t seen in a few years showed up with a truck load of firewood.  Dean has a firewood business near Des Moines.  Dean kept the campfire fed and we enjoyed its warmth.  The temperatures was really cold at night!  Daryl, Connie and Dawn joined us around the camp fires each night with all sorts of conversation topics!

One morning, I was enjoying my morning coffee with Dawn and Connie around the camp fire.  Daryl needed to replenish the water in his RV.  Dean and Brad were helping him.  They had filled a large bladder of water up at another location in the campground.  The water bladder was in the back of a utility ATV.  The guys were trying to figure out how to get the water from the bladder to the RV inlet tube without a pump.  We all began to watch the guys try and use physics to defy gravity.  Dean was using a cipher hose with no progress.  I realize that gravity will help.  The guys had everything they needed to solve the challenge.  The water bladder was in the back of an ATV Ranger with a dump bed.  Daryl has a dump type trailer hooked up to his RV.  The trailer allows Daryl to ride his trike, car or ATV up on the trailer bed without ramps.  So I suggest that the Ranger be back up onto the trailer.  Both the Ranger and the trailer should raise to dump until the height was above the inlet valve of the RV.  The picture can explain it better. It worked!  Now the ladies had water to wash the camp fire smoke out of their hair!  

RV life can be challenging when dry camping.  Water has to be conserved and toilets used at a minimum in order to remain in place for several day stretches.  The campground at Conesville is dry camping.  Porta-johns are readily available throughout the campground.  There is a shower house across the race track with a few showers. It is often crowded.  Water rationing was a topic of discussion one day around the camp fire.  Brad had told Dawn and Connie they could use the shower in Brad’s RV.  Dawn, being the guest in Daryl’s RV, took Brad up on the offer to use the shower in his Rock Star Bus.  I told Dawn that she had to take a Navy shower.  Dawn has no military background and I think I saw a glimpse of horror across her face when Brad insisted she HAD to take a Navy shower.  Surely a Navy shower must involve some sorts of debauchery.  After all, both Brad and I were telling Dawn that she must take one.  Brad finally explained the procedures of a Navy shower and assured Dawn that she’d be inside the RV alone.  She realized we were not pulling her leg or trying to get her into a compromising situation.  End result, Dawn took a Navy shower free of debauchery. 

Gator Bites

We stayed one extra night at Loretta Lynn’s Ranch after the rally was over.  This allowed us to avoid all the RV and motorcycle traffic as people exited the Tennessee Motorcycles & Music Revival (TMMR). We rode north from Tennessee through Kentucky.  I found a Corps of Engineers Campground in southern Illinois.  It is on the Carlyle Reservoir.  

Brad and I developed a plan to make our way to Utah by camping at least two nights in one spot. This provided a recovery night from driving.  Then the next morning was a motorcycle ride to explore the surrounding area.  The second morning was labeled a  “move morning” where we packed up the motorcycles and RV and plotted our next stop as we traveled westward.  This “move morning” and “ride morning” formula worked really well for us.

Just before we arrived at Carlyle Reservoir, Brad spotted the Swamp Town sign advertising Gator Bites and Crawfish.  We were in Illinois.  I didn’t know where the gator bites were going to be sourced from.  The next morning was a “ride morning.”  We went for our motorcycle ride around the large Carlyle Reservoir and stopped at Swamp Town for lunch.

Swamp Town Cajun Kitchen & Cocktails was featured on the show Bar Rescue.  The sign and some interior enhancements like an indoor pond with a footbridge and fog machines were a result of the show.  The pond had replica alligators and coy fish.  It was pretty neat.  The staff indicated they wished that the show remodeled the kitchen or bar service area instead of installing the fog machines and making new signs.  It was neat to hear about the Bar Rescue Show because a couple of years before Brad and I met, former owners of a bar in Austin, Texas, that was rebranded by the show.

Brad enjoyed the gator bites at the bar.  There was a silver-haired woman who had downed her second Michelob Ultra during the time it took us to place our order.  Brad was telling the bartender about our ride around the reservoir.  We had passed a number of small utility sheds.  The type that a homeowner would use to store a lawn mower and other tools inside.  These sheds along the route had signs labeling them as a “Hot Spot”.  We were not familiar with what these “Hot Spots” were.  Brad asked about the Hot Spot sheds.  The silver-haired lady piped up, expressing serious displeasure with the sheds and other establishments with hot spots.  She stated that they are gambling places that are addicting.  They take advantage of people with no money to lose.  They are positions in small neighborhoods making it easy to hook players and take their money.  This lady was animate that the laws allowing the small “hot spots” are wrong and are hurting the communities.  She was visibly upset. We changed the topic.  This woman transitioned into telling us stories about her past.  Once upon a time, she dated a man with a motorcycle.  She said he was a moron but she liked riding his motorcycle.   She told us about some of her rides.  I think she had just as many stories as Brad.  It was a fun lunch break experience!

Truck Dead Got a Bicycle

 

There I am at the Tennessee Motorcycles & Music Revival (TMMR) at about 2 o’clock in the morning.  I am awakened in my slumber by a pull-behind RV backing into the campsite next to me.  I am nice and comfy in my hammock.  The hammock is hung off the back of my jeep at a 45-degree angle and partially in the path of the reversing camper trailer.  I see the red tail lights getting closer to me.  The trailer safely halts several feet from me and moves forward.  I am grateful the driver has some good backing skills and sees my hammock in the darkness.  The driver readjusts his reverse approach and positions his trainer with plenty of space between us.  I feel safe and it turns out there is plenty of room for his dirt bikes to be lined up between his camper and my Jeep.  

I admit I was a little bummed having someone camping next to me.  After all, when I am not motorcycling, I am camping somewhere remote and usually alone.  The crisp night air was pitch black.  I had to pee, so I exited my hammock and made my way to the nearest porta-john. I pass two figures in the darkness and proclaim “welcome” as I walked swiftly to the porta-john.  I was happy that our figures were outlined in the darkness and it was too dark to make eye contact.  I was on the verge of doing the pee-pee dance and was avoiding conversation.  I take care of watering the horse and return to my comfy hammock in hopes to get some sleep before sunrise. 

Less than an hour passes, and I need to pee again! It must be an old man symptom. I tried to ignore the urge to pee and go back to sleep.  That didn’t work.  I had to go!  I know my new neighbors had recently finished setting up their trailer.  I hurried down the familiar route to the porta-john. I pulled on the porta-john door while simultaneously getting the urge to do the pee-pee dance.  The door to the porta-john wouldn’t open.  I was confused.  There were not many tents in this area.  It was around 4 o’clock in the morning.  The late-night parties had stopped hours ago.  I thought to myself, could there really be someone else using this porta-john? I think I have been the only person using this particular facility for the last three days.  Could the door be stuck?  So I lightly tapped my finger three times on the plastic door.  Tap, Tap, Tap.  I heard a response echoing my same soft tap and rhythm. Tap, tap, Tap.  It confirmed to me that someone was inside. I quickly turned and made a beeline directly to the next closest porta-john as I could not wait. 

The next closest porta-john was less than a minute of walking fast.  It wasn’t a big deal - just me running around in the dark.  I returned to the shelter of my hammock to get some sleep.  As I lay relaxing, I heard a soft female voice in the darkness.  The voice confirmed she was my new neighbor and wanted to apologize for arriving in the middle of the night, making noise.  She shared that she and her husband had been traveling from Ohio when their truck broke down.  So they purchased a new truck to make the journey.  I learned my new friends were named Jo and Jason.  Jason went to sleep after the long day and drive.  Jo and I shared stories while watching the moon set and the sun rise. We moved from my hammock area and drank our morning coffee while sitting in the river, watching the sunrise.  Jason joined us shortly after sunrise then continued setting up there camp.

This couple made a major purchase of a brand-new truck to complete their journey to TMMR.  It was that important to them to attend.  Jo and Jason are small business owners and work hard all year long, so this event was a true revival for them.  Jo posted her and Jason’s truck broke down story on the social media app Instagram.  The TMMR officials learned about their story of determination to attend the revival despite their truck breaking down.  The TMMR officials text messaged Jo and wanted to meet her.  Jo and Jason returned from the meeting and were excited to report that the staff was to honor them during opening ceremonies on the main stage for the bands.  Jason was preparing what to say during the ceremony.

On the evening of the ceremony, Brad and I arrived early to get close to the stage.  Each evening, the Pledge of Allegiance and the National Anthem were played before the bands performed.  This was a neat experience to feel the positive patriotic energy of the performers and of the crowd.  Jo and Jason were introduced by Loretta Lynn’s daughter or granddaughter. She spoke a little about Jo and Jason.  She was holding the microphone in front of Jason so he could tell his story.  Jason took hold of the microphone and began walking around the stage as he told his story.  I could tell that the organizers didn’t plan on that.  Maybe they were trying to keep to a schedule, and Jason was going to keep talking!  I had a flash of amusement as I thought the organizer was discretely trying to take the microphone back from Jason.  The story was told.  It was then announced that TMMR sponsor, Budweiser, had a gift for Jo and Jason.  The gift could help out if their truck broke down again.  Brad immediately thought Budweiser was donating a pickup truck to them.  As the spotlight moved to the side of the stage, a red and white Budweiser-themed bicycle rolled out.  Jo and Jason were presented with a Budweiser beach cruiser-type bicycle.  Cool gift!

Aqua Banjo Man

There we are, under two blue pop-up shelters that are usually seen around the fields at youth sporting events.  It is a dark and chilly night.  We were sharing stories with Kevin and Donna’s family when rain began to fall in sheets. Water was pouring off the edges of the pop-up shelters and splashing the backs of people seated in their camp chairs.  People stood and scooted their chairs towards the center to escape the range of the splashing cold rain.  Then, all the lights went out in the campground.  Kevin turned on his generator, which turned on the outdoor lights strung under the canopy of his two pop-up shelters.  The camping area immediately around us was pitch black.  The only lights were the lights under the shelter we were in.

There are about 8 of us under the two shelters.  We were engaged in stories, resulting in smiles and laughs as we shared some drinks.  Kevin and Donna shared some unique and awesome experiences raising a family abroad.  All their children are now adults and have impressive accomplishments.  Brad and I were telling stories from our Nowhere Rides.  

As the rain began to fall in sheets, a man and woman came running from the darkness.  The man had a banjo on his back.  The woman had dreadlocked hair that hung to her waist.  Their energy screamed minimalist, carefree nomads.  They asked if they could seek shelter from the rain under the canopy.  The couple stated they were on their way back to their tent when the heavy rain hit.  Brad offered the man with the banjo a can of beer.  The man gladly accepted the beer.  Instead of opening the beer, the man immediately placed the beer in his back pocket.  Yes, he hurriedly slid the beer can in his back pocket! I saw the man’s eyes light up when he spotted the bottle of bourbon on the table.  He asked if he could have a shot of bourbon.  I grabbed the bottle and a disposable shot glass and poured a shot for him.  He took the cup from my hand and poured the shot down his throat in one quick, fluid motion.  He obviously had experience with this motion of drinking shots. Without voicing any words, the guy smiled and then showed me the empty cup.  It was as if he was silently asking for another second shot.  After the second shot was gone, he silently held the empty cup to me.  He was asking for another.  Three shots of good bourbon in a row!  I usually sip and enjoy good bourbon.   

After the third shot of bourbon, the man started playing his banjo.  The group under the canopy gave attention to the first couple of songs.  Then we returned to their conversations, which were previously interrupted by these two carefree nomads.  I spoke with the banjo player’s girlfriend.  I learned that the man plays with one of the bands playing on stage at the rally.  As conversations continued, I heard the banjo player singing a chorus over and over.  The tuned words chanted something like this: “Would you pour me some more bourbon, please? I know you want to. I want you to.  Pour me a little more bourbon, please.”  He sang these words a few times as I saw his girlfriend smiling ear to ear at my discovery of the chorus.  I obliged and poured a shot. I extending the shot to the banjo player.  One fluid motion, and it was gone, the cup returned and extended towards me for another.  I poured another.  He extended the empty cup to me again.  I grimaced.  He spoke this time.  He told me this one was for his girlfriend.  Well, okay, I poured another shot, acknowledging this girlfriend on the opposite side of the shelter. The banjo man quickly drank it and formed a big smile.  Moments later, he thanked us for the hospitality.  He and his girlfriend departed the shelter, running into the rain and darkness.  Brad snapped this picture of us.  He said I reluctantly poured the bourbon.  The rain-soaked banjo bourbon drinker will be forever known to us as the Aqua Banjo Man.  This banjo-strapped stranger appeared from the dark rain.  Pocketed our beer.  Drank our bourbon.  Shared some songs.  Drank more bourbon.  Disappeared into the dark rain shower.  Cheers to you, Aqua Banjo Man, and your girlfriend. 

TMMR Events

The Tennessee Motorcycles & Music Revival (TMMR) 2025 ranks at the top of the list for motorcycle rallies we’ve experienced.  It is a family-friendly environment.  Loretta Lynn’s Ranch is amazing for this type of event.  The river, the hills, and trees offer the perfect outdoor setting.  Everyone we encountered was friendly.  Everyone was there to have. Great time with music and motorcycles.

Some notable rally events we witnessed were:

- Charity Rubber Duck Race.  Ducks were numbered and released in the creek.  The ducks raced down the current to a designated finish line.  Someone scooped up the first duck to check the number to declare the winner.  About a dozen folks with fishing nets captured all the rubber ducks as they passed the finish line.

- Hill Climb.  The Ranch has a designated hill to host the famous hill climb.  Picture-perfect location with old grain silos across the road where visitors park in the grass.  We saw motorcycles of all types - dirt bikes and full dressers (touring bikes) race up the hill.  There were a few riders that were probably 12 years old who raced up the hill competing with the gray-bearded riders. 

- Belly Flop Contest.  There is a pool near Honky Tonk Central camping area.  The pool had guys and gals of all ages competing in the belly flop contest, splashing as they landed chest-first in the pool.

- Dirt Track Race.  This was awesome to watch as bikes raced around the track and through the dust.

- Slow Race.  These are always fun to watch.  All ages and all types of motorcycles.  This one was elimination.  Winners kept circling the track to race again until the slowest rider was remaining.

- Classic Motorcycle Bike Show. I always get excited admiring the details of classic bikes with unique assessors and their paint.

- Burn out contest. Exciting.  Bring ear plugs and stay down wind from the smoke!

- Kick Start Contest. This one was interesting.  Need to know “how” to kick start a bike to win. It is more than just kicking the pedal!

- Parade of bikes through the camp.  This happened a few times I think. I saw a lot of young riders on their small bikes enjoying the attention.

- Cage of Death.  I think there were two motorcycles and a person inside the round cage.  The motorcycles were orbiting the person standing in the middle. 

- Bands.  It impressed me that the Pledge Of Allegiance and the National Anthem were played each night during opening ceremonies before the bands performed. 

This was a family friendly music and motorcycle event.  Brad and I felt like it was definitely a revival - we enjoyed it and consider the rally the best we’ve attended!

Black Widow

I arrived at Loretta Lynn’s Ranch a day or two before the events started.  I set up my hammock next to the river.  I put my rain tarp up over my hammock for shade.  I was relaxing in my hammock when a woman parked down the river from my campsite.  She drove a small car and parked where the gravel meets the grass.  She was obviously  much older than I.  She displayed a handicap tag from her vehicle.  I saw her pull a new tent out of its box.  I know tents can be a challenge to set up for the first time.  It is a good idea to practice setting up the tent at home.  I watched her efforts figuring out the new tent for a minute or two.  Then I went over to introduce myself.  She welcomed my assistance setting up her tent.  Together we made the task much easier.  It was a large tent and I could not imagine setting it up alone.

I discovered that this woman has been attending TMMR for several years.  She was here last year, and her friend had been killed in an unfortunate freak accident.  A motorcycle was traveling through the vendor area.  Her friend and she were crossing the street.  The motorcycle struck her friend.  Her friend hit her head on the pavement and later died from the head injury.  The woman telling me the story was walking next to her friend when she was struck by the motorcycle.  It was a difficult thing to experience.  So the woman decided to come to the TMMR event this year to honor her late friend.  She rented a golf cart to get safely around the venue.  The golf cart was a great idea.  She had a seat at all the events.  The cart could be parked in prime spots to view the events.    

As the conversation continues, I discover this woman went on a cruise last fall.  This is the same year as the unfortunate accident.  It was her and a different girlfriend on the cruise.  While the ship was underway, her friend passed away.  This was just a few months after the motorcycle accident that claimed her other friend.  I decided to keep my distance from this woman who was now referred to as the Black Widow.  I say that lightheartedly.  She was a nice woman honoring her friend.  I remember mornings sitting in the creek sipping my coffee.  I look downstream and see her tent perched on the riverbank.  The door to her tent opens.  She’d step outside and give me a wave before starting her morning routine.  I’d wave back.  

TMMR

 The Tennessee Motorcycles & Music Revival (TMMR) was the highlight of our 2025 Nowhere Ride.  Brad and I both agree that it was the best rally we’ve been to!  The annual event goes in the spring at the Queen of Country and Legendary Songwriter, Loretta Lynn’s Ranch in Hurricane Mills, Tennessee.  The Ranch is an awesome setting with lots of trees, a creek, hills, and cool people!

 TMMR is four days of music and motorcycle events that will revive your soul. The Ranch is huge and offers many RV and camping sites.  There is Vendor Alley where swag and related products are for sale.  There are a couple of bars and food trucks. Many events throughout the days are scheduled.  All events are family-friendly.  The venue was packed with folks of all ages.  I was impressed by how friendly, respectful, and happy everyone was at this rally.  I saw zero aggressive behavior.  This was truly a setting to revive your soul!

 Brad was on vacation, spending some time with family in Virginia.  There must have been a lot of alcohol involved because he told me he woke up one morning to see Yogi Bear driving a golf cart through the campground.  I met Brad at Loretta Lynn’s Ranch.  He had reserved an RV site at Honky Tonk Central, a camping location designated for RVs.  He set up his RV and unloaded his motorcycle and mini bikes.  I am happy he brought two mini bikes.  We rode those bikes all over the camping areas!  

 I set up in what is called Camping Area 3 along Hurricane Creek.  I drove my Jeep and pulled my motorcycle on a utility trailer.  I was one of the first campers to arrive in that area, so I set up my hammock pretty close to the creek.  I enjoyed every morning with my feet in the water.  I returned to the creek in the afternoons.  I put a chair in the creek at just the right depth to enjoy the water’s current around my back and body.  A few folks would join me sitting in the water.  Several people floated by on rafts and tubes.  What a way to spend the day!  An amazing camping experience!

Conesville Redneck Revival 24

Brad and I met in Conesville at the Redneck Revival. We’ve been meeting at this rally for a number of years.  The appeal is to visit with friends who we met at this rally several years ago.  The rally itself is located in the middle of cornfields.  There is a quarter-mile drag racing track.  The track is open for anyone and any machine as long as the driver attends the driver’s safety meeting and wears a helmet.  A driver can race other drivers or just race the clock.  I’ve seen motorcycles of all types race down the track. The serious race enthusiasts zoom their nitros cars, trucks, and motorcycles down the track.  I’ve seen a motorized picnic table race down the track.  Pretty awesome entertainment.  Don’t forget earplugs!  The track gets extremely loud during burnouts and races.  The track is open to everyone to race any wheeled machine.  On Saturday morning there is a competition which is exciting to watch. 

Besides the two-lane drag track, the venue offers a number of events open to everyone.  Some highlights are the dash for cash.  This is where participants run through a mud bog course naked.  The winner gets a bucket of cash at the end.  There is a mud bog too.  After the dash for cash, there is usually a parade around the campground.  Rally goers ride their motorcycles, golf carts, or other all-terrain vehicles while wearing costumes or nothing at all.  If I recall correctly, the parade might occur multiple times during the weekend.  In the evenings, there are usually two bands scheduled to play at the main stage.  Directly in front of the main stage is a concrete dance area.  Viewers often park their golf carts and motorcycles in the grass on the edge of the concrete area.  This allows people to sit on their bikes to watch the bands.  Adjacent to the outdoor stage is a large covered area with another stage, bar, dancing area, and picnic tables.  On that stage, there is a DJ, comedian, or other shows.  There is a zip line extending from the stage along one side of the covered area.  Yep, a zip line.  There is an 8-foot soft penis to land on at the end of the zip line.  One year, there were a few mattresses under the zip line for folks that fall off before reaching the end of the line.  Apparently, one year, someone fell off and broke a leg and thus the mattresses were added. 

Events officially start on Thursday nights with a themed party.  The latest I recall was a 50’s-style band with slicked-back hair and 50’s attire. This band had a large double bass which sounded awesome.  Most people in attendance on Thursday night get costumed up in themed attire; couples are in character-matching costumes, short skirts, lingerie, and things your eyes won’t believe.  Adult party and no cameras allowed.  Thursday night is known as the “perv review”.  The perv review consists of various beauty and best-of-class-type contests.  Not for the faint of heart!  Brad and I get a kick out of watching people watch people. Watching humans consume alcohol at these themed events is a fun experience. 

On Saturday, there is a king and queen contest on an elevated stripper stage. The king and queen contests are separate.  Participants volunteer from the crowd.  Once the MC introduces who is on stage, the DJ will play a song.  The contestants will dance provocatively until the song ends.  Then the MC will use a noise meter to eliminate contestants. The loudest cheers from the crowd determine which contestant remains on stage to dance to the next song until the winner is declared.  The winner gets a bucket of money that contains donations from the crowd.  I think last year it was around $800 for the queen and maybe $400 for the king.  There is something to see for everyone!  

 The highlight for me in 2024 at Conesville was the tornado warning.  I can never remember the difference between a tornado watch and a warning.  A watch is when conditions are favorable for a tornado, so people should be prepared.  A tornado warning is when a tornado is imminent, and people should take action, like take shelter now.  I was in my hammock when the sky suddenly darkened.  The wind began to whip my rain tarp away from the trees, and rain started pouring down.  There was some thunder and lightning too.  My cell phone broadcasted an alert declaring a tornado warning and residents should seek shelter.  I felt the trees swaying and pulling my hammock with them.  I felt that my hammock was about to be converted into a hang glider against my will.  I have déjà vu from two years earlier when I was in my hammock at this exact same campsite, and a tornado warning happened.  Here I am again dealing with the same unexpected weather!  The intensity of the storm lasted several minutes.  It passed just as abruptly as it came.  I posted a short video on Instagram showing my hammock blowing in the wind.  Brad’s son, Andrew, saw my video and immediately called Brad.  Brad was inside his rock star bus.  Andrew said the man is going to die in the storm or get struck by lightning, let him inside the RV!  

Note that the pictures are my photos from earlier years at the rally and not all from 2024.  My short videos from those two tornados are posted at the links below.